Simply hoping for a miracle solution to the problem at work is useless. One thing is clear: when different personalities and working styles clash at work, conflicts are virtually unavoidable. These are not only unpleasant, but also expensive: absenteeism caused by workplace bullying amounts to several billion euros every year in Germany. And that is only a fraction of all the costs that companies have to reckon with. Therefore, don't be shy - before unpleasant confrontations and escalation occur, a conflict discussion should be considered.

What is a conflict discussion?

It is not uncommon for arguments to arise between different people. This is also the case at work. There are various reasons for this. Conflicts usually arise when colleagues disagree about something, have different views or employees have to overcome challenges in their private lives at the same time as at work. There can also be disputes between employers and employees if the employee is annoyed by the company's approach, does not like the work process or repeatedly disregards rules. Conflicts in the workplace are not uncommon: in Austria, employees were surveyed and found that they notice tensions in the workplace on a weekly basis^.1 This affects the mood and motivation of those involved and leads to poorer work results. In order to resolve conflicts sustainably and to everyone's satisfaction, conflict discussions are held, ideally involving all parties to the dispute and an impartial moderator. A few simple rules should be observed to ensure that such a discussion does not become as unpleasant as its reputation.

Bullying in the workplace?

Anyone who thinks that bullying only exists in schools is mistaken. Unfortunately, more than 60% of employees in German companies have already experienced bullying^.2 Conflicts at work can exacerbate an already stressful situation. As a result, employees can experience anxiety, permanent stress, burnout and sickness-related absences. In such cases, almost one in two employees criticizes the lack of fair conflict ^resolution3 and approaches to finding solutions.

Preparation for the conflict discussion

It is important that a conflict discussion can take place on a suitable, unscheduled day with the parties involved and in peace. This way, none of the parties involved are under stress, as the discussion can take some time. The location also plays an important role. It can be helpful to meet with the colleagues involved at a neutral location outside the company. If this is not feasible, it is advisable to look for a quiet place within the company where you can have a conversation undisturbed.

All participants should be aware of the rules of the discussion group. Courtesy is of the highest priority. Everyone should have enough time to express their opinion. It is very important to enter the discussion openly and not to reject other people's suggestions as a matter of principle. Being ironic or aggressive is just as much a no-go as interrupting the other person. This sets back progress in the conversation and distracts those involved from solving the problem. It is better to keep calm here. Emotions are important in such conversations, but they should be well measured. It is advisable to use "I" messages instead of "you" messages. During the discussion, it is better to use phrases such as: "I think it's unfair" instead of negatively charged comments such as: "You treat me unfairly when you...".

Implementation

The first step should be to clarify what is bothering those involved. It should be possible to clearly define the problems. Ideally, the reasons for these problems can then be identified during the discussion. After that, nothing stands in the way of jointly developing a solution and finding the causes of past problems.

What led to the dispute? What started it and how long has it been going on? By answering these questions together, the parties can work out the core of the problem and ideally agree on a solution or compromise.

Conclusion

On average, full-time employees spend almost 1,600 hours a year at work^.4 The workplace is therefore our second home, and we sometimes spend more time with our colleagues than with our family. Conflicts in the workplace are therefore quite common. In order to resolve them (or prevent them from arising in the first place), professional communication is required. Conflict resolution helps to solve problems effectively and create harmony in everyday working life.